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Becoming: To be “nobody but yourself” — in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else — means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.


In the world we live in, it’s not easy to be authentically ourselves. It’s very easy to drift from oneself and be anything as the wind blows. It’s even sadder because time ticks in our eyes as we watch ourselves every day being nothing but who we are not. Societal expectations have caused many of us to drift away from our inner power into a non-existent life. Many of us had drifted away from our inner strength into a non-existent living as a result of societal demands. Social media has made it even harder because everyone has mastered the art of putting their best foot forward. We live our lives in the shadow of other people’s creations, ignoring who we truly are.

It is truly fulfilling to be authentic. Authenticity is rare, and when you find yourself living authentically, be grateful because it ain’t so cheap. I know how it feels to shrink and negate my inner self and live a life based on what others impose on me. It went as far as wanting to change my personality traits and the way I spoke, walked, and felt. I truly did not feel good enough.

Fatal conflicts were required to unleash the beast within me and it took practically a lifetime for me to mature into the delicate, lovely lady I knew I could be.
I had to accept the fact that I was more than what I thought I was.
I’m at ease with myself and confident in my own skin. The journey of becoming is never-ending. It isn’t a one-day affair.
Every day is a new chance to become the person you were born to be.

How do we become? You may ask.
Well, here are ways to become.

  • Let go of excuses : It’s pointless to blame people for what happened to you. It clearly won’t get you anywhere instead cause anger and resentment in your heart. Let go and take responsibility for your mistakes and learn from them. You will improve as an individual when you do this.


  • Do not hold grudges : It’s easier said than done to not hold grudges. You must not allow your bitterness to grow. Your mental state and health suffer more when you hold grudges. You even age quicker. Write down your feelings, pray, and meditate.


  • Speak openly : If you want to be a better person, you should always be honest with your feelings, thoughts, and ideas. Make your message known with respect.

Maybe you’re not sure why you should be authentic yet. Allow me to assist you.
There are many benefits to being Your authentic self which you will discover as you begin the journey of becoming. You will discover how much of a good, satisfying, and effortless life you have been depriving yourself with.

Becoming: Here are a few of the advantages of living an authentic life.

  • Your health improves : This is where it becomes practical. When you are authentic with yourself, you’ll be far more inclined to take care of yourself. People who are committed to living an authentic life are more likely to eat healthy meals, exercise regularly. Being your real self also benefits your mental health since you are calmer, less conflicted, and overall happier!


  • Keep you focused : When you live an authentic life, you will be able to cope well with life, and its hurdles. You will begin to prioritize yourself and stop worrying about what will people say. Life becomes even easier when you face difficulties and hardships because you would have mastered the art of problem-solving.


  • You will always be restful : That is correct. You know why? When you live the life you are supposed to live, it becomes impossible to be negative at all times. Express yourself fully and live life to the utmost.

The best part about becoming is that you no longer have anyone or anything to prove other than yourself. You are no longer searching for anything except the truth, which is very inaccessible in today’s world. My life has certain routines, like going out and exercising first thing each morning, journaling, and praying. Following the 20/20/20 formula from The 5 Am Club by Robin Sharma has been fulfilling.

There’s a lot of freedom in being yourself. You begin to understand that you are important and valuable just the way you are. You don’t have to change and pretend to be someone else.
You’ll be robbing the world of your awesomeness and gifts that come with simply being yourself. It is even vital for us to become unique as creatives, especially in our field. Recognize that no one thinks the same way you do. No one will ever be able to write as well as you. Be confident in your abilities and strive to be the best version of yourself. Nothing should stand in the way of you becoming who you are. There is no one else in the world like you.

Only you and you alone can exist. Be authentic. BECOME.

In your quest of finding YOU, remember that there’s a woman in South Africa who loves and cares for you.

Let me hear you in the comment section. What are your thoughts on becoming??

From my heart to yours


This Post Has 35 Comments

  1. I am an authentic grudge holder, and it works well for me. I get feisty and determined the bigger the grudge. I only hold the grudge until resolution of the issue. Once resolved, no longer a reason for grudge and I go merrily along until the next incident. There is always a next incident. Do you think authenticity is an individual kind of attribute? I do. We each must find our own way, but I like your suggestions. Bon chance!

    1. Lebogang Shazzygal Malatji

      Thank you so much for your sentiment. Forgiveness is easy when two people address the issue and come to terms with what happened. It might not be easy in the beginning, bit over time we heal and move on.

      I hope you find it in your heart to not allow yourself to hold so much grudge because sometimes the pain is way more harmful to you than he/she who wronged you. I love you and keep well.

      1. Beloved, if I had not learned to hold constructive grudges I would never have solved the mystery of how I lost my home from simply filing a homeowner insurance claim. I will never forgive the criminals that did this. I will leave that to others. My objective is justice. Luckily, I usually have only one grudge to work off at one time. I’ve worked this one for five years. It takes a long time to uncover racketeering.

        Blessings and peace be with you!

        1. Lebogang Shazzygal Malatji

          Im really sorry to hear that
          And I truly, totally understand your stance. Glad the grudge finally led you to solve the issue at hand and benefited you.
          For five years?? It must have been tough though. I’m glad you were able to get over it finally.

          1. Not done yet. Racketeering proof takes a long time because so many agencies and individuals are involved and they protect each other through their criminal network.

          2. Lebogang Shazzygal Malatji

            Strength to you my sister🧡🧡
            May you find the strength to fight till the end until justice is done to you

  2. elvira797mx

    Wow! Amazing and empowering post! Thank’s for share Lebogang.
    Have a wonderful time dear friend!
    Keep well.

    1. Lebogang Shazzygal Malatji

      Thabk you so much mommy
      I truly ‘Becoming’ is not a one day event. Its a daily process, with small authentic acts which will eventually lead to full Authentic self. I appreciate your comment and reading.
      Keep well. I love you

      1. elvira797mx

        Thanks dear friend for your kindness. I tus true.
        It is a pleassure.
        Take care too. Best wishes!🙏🏻🤗🤍

        1. Lebogang Shazzygal Malatji


  3. Obong eno

    Nothing but the truth dear, great thoughts ❣️
    Keep up the good work

    1. Lebogang Shazzygal Malatji

      Thank you so much my friend
      Hope we make it to the other side of becoming the best versions of ourselves. Nothing beats the thought of just being Ourselves.

  4. Sowmya

    Empowering post Lebogang. Very true that often times we drift away from our true identity to meet the societal challenges. Great pointers, tips and inspirations in the journey of becoming.

    1. Lebogang Shazzygal Malatji

      Thank you so much mommy for your encouraging words. ive long had this post in my draft but felt inadequate because I thought I had not fully become but I realized that the journey of becoming is truly not a one day event…..but a process. I’m still in the process and it feels good.
      I love you dearly

        1. Lebogang Shazzygal Malatji

          I forgot to tell you that I tried one of your recipes, vegetable soup and it worked wonders

          1. Sowmya

            Glad to hear that it came out well Lebogang

          2. Lebogang Shazzygal Malatji

            Thank you so much 🧡🧡

  5. Janice Reid

    Great post and some excellent points. Glad you grew to accept your true self and you’re right, that’s when we’re at our best!

    1. Lebogang Shazzygal Malatji

      Thank you so much
      And not only at our best but it gives us so much freedom to live an authentic life. Thank you so much. Much appreciate you for passing by.

  6. helensmusings10

    Your take on blame spoke to me…I’m very very old and have always blamed other people or circumstances for having robbed me of the opportunities to be who I think I could have been. Its only recently that I have realised I can , at this advanced age, be who I have always wanted to be !! Taking baby steps torwards my goals!!!

    1. Lebogang Shazzygal Malatji

      Ohh im so glad that this post spoke to you. You know one thing I’ve realized is that, Becoming is not a one day event but a constant process which eventually yields good products. May you continue to be the best version of yourself, even in your old age. We love seeing people like you advance in wisdom and learning from a younger generation without any judgement. Thank you so much
      The gap is being bridged fully

  7. hgamma

    I obey
    since my childhood
    the Great Mother

    the soul
    the ghost
    is in us
    not out there

    1. Lebogang Shazzygal Malatji

      I forgot how well you are with words. Thank you so much for this.

  8. hgamma

    I’m in a dream
    not the author

    I play in the drama of the soul
    only a supporting role

    i am time
    next to other people
    for a short time

    i do my job
    every day as best as I can

    of mother earth
    I am no less
    no more than everyone else

    1. Lebogang Shazzygal Malatji

      I do my job
      Everyday as best as I can
      Of mother earth
      I am no less
      No more than everyone else.

  9. So profound. I also remember how it is said that the only constant is change. I believe in the journey to “become” and to “be authentic” we must have teachable spirits and always be ready to learn and do better. Thankyou for this beautiful post my darling x

    1. Lebogang Shazzygal Malatji

      Ohhh so profound Satu🧡🧡
      You know-how much rebellious we can be sometimes. We think we know it all😅😅and I’ve also realized that we love taking charge of our own lives and forgetting to allow the Holy Spirit to take charge. . the binle says He is our helper amd He abides with us forever.
      Teachable spirit is one oft daily prayers. Thank you so much for this point. It’s very important

  10. wendaswindowcom

    You always are so good at expressing the hard things that we all endure. It makes me get mad at the devil for making you feel bad at times because you are such a bright light in my eyes. You should remember that Satan is a liar and the Lord loves you greatly. You covered this subject in a special way. Be encouraged Shazzy! You are very special!

    1. Lebogang Shazzygal Malatji

      Ohh mama
      Thank you so much. I truly appreciate you. I think I should start believing in myself more. My poster syndrome sometimes gets the best of me but im fighting it every day. I thank God for people like you to always remind me of my worth and potential. I truly appreciate it and I love you for always being my cheerleader everytime I feel down. Thank you so much

  11. TanvirKaur

    A wonderful thought penned and marvellously executed.

    1. Lebogang Shazzygal Malatji

      Thank you so much mate
      I truly appreciate

  12. seankfletcher

    A very good post and one that serves as a reminder to why it’s important to be authentic. Well, I am, “what you see is what you get.” I always have been. A long time ago when I was first applying for low level promotions in the department where I worked in a large government corporation. The outcome was always in the negative. I was told repeatedly though, that the supervisors liked my honest answers. When this explanation was provided for what was the the last time in that department, I made the decision to apply for positions elsehere. The result: I ended up with a traineeship in industrial relations within that corporation. They liked what I had to say. The industrial relations branch as such, were like the keeper to the keys of the kingdom – protecting the organisation from whatever was thrown at it from both within and from without. I never looked back. That experience put me on the path to understanding that a core requirement regarding leadership is integrity – being authentic. Never let anyone else tell you otherwise or try to undermine the core values and ethics that you have.

    1. Lebogang Shazzygal Malatji

      You have always been a hard worker in your fields of work and I believe that your contributions to the companies and corporates you’ve worked for had been blessed to have you. Authenticity is very attractive. It always draws people to you because they get to experience nothing but the best of you. Thank you for being such a great example of authentic living.

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